Tuesday, May 5, 2009

How To Cook Ramps Like A Pornstar - HFP's Guide Day 1

It's officially ramp week at Hot Food Porn home headquarters and I am going to cook with ramps all friggin week because they are amazingly tasty. I've had more than a couple of people ask me recently, "what should I do with ramps?" Or "what are ramps?" "How do I cook ramps?" So I decided to have a little fun and expound the beauty, art and sexiness of ramp cooking.

Welcome to Hot Food Porn's How To Cook Ramps Like a Pornstar guide:

A little bit of info for those that do not know:

Ramps are considered as wild leeks and grow in wild in forest patches commonly in the mid-Atlantic to Northeast part of the US. They are seasonal spring. They are a flavor probably most common to Chinese Chives crossed with Leeks.

Rules for Cooking Ramps Like A Pornstar:

1. Absolutely Without Abandon
Go BIG or Go Home. You've got to sell it because people who love eating ramps know when you're just mailing it in and laying it down cautiously. You know you've reach ramp satisfaction when you've got Meg Ryan blushing like a school girl.

2. Multiple Partners, A-OK
Ramps play best when you throw them in with multiple partners of vegetable and meats. E.g. ramps in potato salad or ramps in meatballs/meatloaf. Clusterf@#king not an issue for ramps, versatility.

3. Experimentation
You never know how good ramps can be until you give it a little experimentation. I've seen them with a goat. How far can you push the edge of ramp experimentation? Caution and fear need not be a factor.

More rules, lessons and tips to follow throughout the week...

My Monday's How To Cook Ramps Like A Pornstar dinner:

Penne and Buffalo Moroccan Meatballs in Ramp Pesto
-Parm Reggiano, Carmelized Onions

1 comment:

  1. off topic, but the Beast logo reminds me of yours!


    mmmmm... penne looks good!