So I was in LA last week and found myself totally disinterested in anything going on during a Friday afternoon. I ended up going to see Inglorious Basterds (which was enjoyable but far from Pulp Fiction enjoyable) and then walked around the surrounding South Bay Galleria mall. I was walking in the direction towards Macy’s when a cute French accented woman at one of the beauty product carts stops me. Normally I just brush the vendor people off without a problem, but this girl was undeniably attractive and charming, so I was caught off guard. 15 seconds later, she was grabbing my hand both gently but assertively and trying to sell me on testing out this amazing sea salt scrub. It was really a moment of weakness on my behalf, but I just happen to be a sucker for assertive, disarmingly charming, and attractive women with French accents. What were the odds?
But right before she decided to dip my hands into the bowl of imported sea salt, I stopped her by showing her all the little cuts and nips I had acquired from cooking and dry skin the other night. Cutting lemons or seasoning with a tiny nick or cut is probably the one of the worst lingering pains you could experience in a kitchen.
After she decided not to dip my wounds in salt, we had the most random conversation that a person could have in an empty mall. She started talking about all these facial masks with food and ended up directing me to some gal on youtube. I then found the cometic video girl named Michelle Phan and decided to share this with everyone because 1). I have to present my good story and excuse for not blogging last week, 2). talk about my preference for charming attractive French woman (in case there are any out there that happen to enjoy this blog) and 3). post curiously enjoyable videos of this girl who loves to treat her face like a dinner plate for the sake of giving my female readership some beauty tips.
Onto the videos:
Michelle Phan puts rice water on her face because she’s Asian and that’s what they do:
Michelle puts egg on her face because she likes the gooey egg white stuff:
Michelle scrubs her face with tomato because she likes facial pizza:
Michelle finishes her 3 course meal on her face with champagne naturally:
Based on what you’ve likely just seen, when it doubt, just rub food on your face. 9 times out of 10 it will be good for you it seems.
Here’s a parody for your enjoyment:
And if that doesn’t work for you, there’s always this…