Friday, March 27, 2009

Twitter Friday - Tweets, Twits and Twats.

A random summary from this week's twitters that came through my door step. No organizing this time, it nearly killed me last week. I just copied and pasted during the week as I saw fit for fun. Here it is, this is what you missed...

Monday - Friday:

BBBaumgartnerSo Rainn Twatted that I am on here. And now I have people reading what I write. I hate the power he has and uses for evil. from web

BBBaumgartnerPeeps-Thanks for the many welcomes and well wishes...but... I like twatted. Not twitted. Not tweeted. Twatted. from web

Brian happens to be Kevin Malone from the office and yes, Brian, I like twatted, too.

dcpatterson riddle me this: what does one say to a customer who orders bone marrow and then proclaims it "too fatty"? from web

Chicharrones@dcpatterson Don't let the door hit you, where the good lord split you! from web in reply to dcpatterson

offalchris@dcpatterson get the fuck out of my restaurant. from TwitterFon in reply to dcpatterson

We chefs really don't care for stupid questions. My response: Who likes a lean bone anyways? Just remember, dumb questions will cost you, but looking stupid is always for free.

Sounds like the new wave of children's entertainment...

AmandaGoldMaple bacon pancakes in the test kitchen. Not as good as they sound. Not from scratch. NOT worth eating. from web

Interesting how the SF Chronicle Test Kitchen found the only thing in this world that probably doesn't taste better with bacon. Considering these standards, let's lighten up on the strap-on during the Bauer reviews, okay?

eatersf Nate Appleman, Boulevard, Nicole Plue among local nominees for '09 Beard Awards: from web

Congrats, one day that may be me holding a golden false idol of worship amongst chefs...

alexstupakoff today! about to go crush 60 oysters and 4 bloody marys with my wife. from web

Alex clearly wasn't considerate enough to tell us what his wife wanted to eat, but when you down 60 oysters with wife in hand, I'm pretty sure we know what's up.

offalchrisCouldn't wait for head to tail, now it's here and i am nervous as hell lots of anticipation. from TwitterFon

Let's just say by Wednesday with the Bourdain train in town, this was definitely no longer the case.

dcpattersoni did something today. but i didn't twitter about it, so it must not have been important. from web

Daniel, your legions of followers feel that even your tweets/twats from the toilet are important. Daniel Patterson probably shits gold, seriously.

BBBaumgartnerThe extra B in my name stands for B-awesome. Or it is the first letter of my middle name. Any guesses? Hint: Not Bambam. from web

Balls. I guess Balls. Did I win?

linecookOrganizing the walk in is like playing a life size game of tetris. from twitterrific

Chicharrones@linecook cleaning the walk in... consolidate or die! Is the law of the land. from twitterrific in reply to linecook

Ryan used to show me the knife when he told me this back in the day. Consolidate or die.

thefeednycAh culinary student folly: "Don't disrespect Ferdinand!" from txt

Further proof that stupidity can't be taught.

GachatzJust tried to get Ramen at ippudo, 1.5 hour wait, moved on to soba ya. Wish we had these options in Chicago... from twitterrific

Grant Achatz should be waiting for no one. How dare them make you wait! Visavis Grant, go to Ramen Setagaya. It's better.

offalchrisIn the shits a full house and he is in the house. from TwitterFon

hotfoodpornIt's a intriguing night when one sec you are eating heart and foie tartare and then next second Bourdain and Harold McGee sit next to you. from web

MeatMavenGreat head to tail dinner with Bourdain & co. Way more fun than expected & great food from @offalchris, as expected. Goose intestines; yum! from Tweetie

Yes, you missed all the good times that we had at Incanto for Head to Tail, guess you'll just have to see my ass on No Reservations... seriously, I think they got an ass shot when I stood up. it's not pretty.

linecook@hotfoodporn she is one hot little potato, but have you read her tweets? that girl eats some shitty food. from TweetDeck in reply to hotfoodporn

hotfoodporn@linecook yeah, she does eat some crap, but that's not an issue when you can do this with food. Bloody Classic. from web in reply to linecook

Olivia Munn + hotdogs = not fair.

linecookDear people of San Francisco: when you order your carbonara with no pancetta, you are seriously breaking my damn heart. from TweetDeck

I do not want to know what life is without joy. It is a dark day.

SFistHelp Us, Alice Waters, You're Our Only Hope? from web

More Alice Waters hater-ade. I'm starting to feel bad for her.

bittmanRT @mjhawley: Leaving PDX, America's #1 airport. Why? <

Hemp milk sounds like something I should taste, but it also sounds like it would taste like bong water.

TheOnionCome On, Lighten Up, I'm Just Being A Total Asshole from twitterfeed

A day in the life...

linecookI feel like Liz Lemon trying to get her phone back, sans naughty pics and Tracy Jordans cash.thefeednycThe Feed File: Padma’s porno, the bagel’s background up photo chemistry to reverse cross process my film :)AnnmerrellJust discovered that the president of our country is on twitter. Think he does his own tweets or did he hire someone for that?
hotfoodporn@Annmerrell he hired a Secretary of Twitter Communication but resigned due to unreported taxes & Congress pressure

Hot Job Alert: Line Cooks needed at Harbour, Joe Isidori's new nautical-themed restaurant: #jobs

Who doesn't want to work in a pirate "nautical -themed" kitchen? YARRR!!!!

Liz Lemon as Bijou the Sex Operator Eats Pizza

Thought this was pretty funny last night...classic Tina Fey as Liz Lemon as Bijou. 1-900-OK-FACE friggin kills me.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Donuts and Hard-ons Go Hand In sort of... aka The Jason Biggs Defense

I found a ridiculous website called Funny Patents and Inventions today and I thought I'd share with everyone an older blog from their site. Apparently there is a US Patent (5885614) out there that says that certain food/lotion odorants (especially seasonal) do wonders for male impotency issues and effectively induce arousal. I shit you not.

Read here. The best part of the synopsis on the blog is that included in those are donuts (which I do not eat often) and pumpkin pie (which I can't get enough of during the winter). So the truth is that you can't really blame a man if he happens to need to hump a pie like Jason Biggs - just remember, the pie totally had it coming.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Wednesday Night Test Kitchen (actually Tuesday) - 3/25

It was actually Tuesday night when I decided to make test kitchen dinner for myself. Nothing complicated this week, just a good old perfect sous vide dry aged 28 oz. steak. Ho hum. Why was this Tuesday night test kitchen and not Wednesday? Because yours truly was dining at Incanto with Chicharrones 4505 Meats creator/chef Ryan Farr. Interestingly enough that was not the only company that I had in the smaller private backroom of Incanto.

Apparently it was an all out San Francisco culinary party @ Chris Consentino's joint - especially when Anthony Bourdain (the ROCKSTAR), Harold McGee (the MAN), Ravi Kapur (of Boulevard), Tatiana Graf (Chris' wife, Boccalone Meat Maven), Yank Sing owners, Jennifer Cox (Joie De Vivre chef) and others rock the tables right next to us. All I can say is any night that in the presence of Harold McGee and Bourdain is a pretty intriguing one.

Well anyways, onto the menu:

28oz 5-hour Sous Vide Dry Aged Prime Rib Cut
-shallots, garlic, coriander, five-spice, ancho chile

Onto the pics:

Seasoned, vac packed and ready to go.

Check out that ridiculous marbleizing dry aged thick meat...

Sous vide action heating up.

5 hours and 1 hot broil sear later...

First cut.

A nice modest fruity cab from Conn Creek to match up.

Perfect temp, perfect steak.

One Cupcake's Journey Including Cupcake Porn Scene

This is still safe for work, it's a long animation, but well worth watching. I think its awesome.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Dangerous Precedents And Philosphical Terrorism

No one would call it cruel if it was Kate Moss.

I won't lie, I am pretty opinionated. As hypocritical as it may be or as I may sound - I try my best to not judge a person's life choices despite how much I may disagree with it. And the fact of the matter is, there are lots of gray and lots of opinions out there that are not my own, e.g. 99.99999% of the other people on this planet. A difference of opinion may be at the root of the controversy over foie gras, but at the root of it - there are dangerous precedents being set over the banning of food items that are not classified as drugs and do not belong to the artificially/chemically hazardous food group.

Without going too much into the whole controversy, foie is created primarily by force feeding ducks/geese, though this is not always the case as described here by Dan Barber. Aside from Dan Barber's wonderful story of sustainable happy geese, most foie comes from a force feeding process outlined as gavage. Beyond identifying the technical process, every other aspect of foie production is primarily gray and you pretty much have to decide whether you feel this process can be claimed as torture or not.

I'm not really going to debate or support foie on the basis of torture - there are enough people including overzealous retro-propagandist organizations like PETA to do that. (If you some research on foie, you'll quickly find people on both sides of the fence and different definitions on what consitutes as torture to them.) What I do question is that if we start banning production of foods that are not based on basic human health concerns, does this begin to create a dangerous precedence? When enough people don't agree with the production of an item, does it warrant banning its production? It is not a stretch of imagination if you decide to call the foie ban an extension of censorship.

Hypothetically if we based food production on relative ideals - whether those are that of humane animal preservation, religious, or cultural. Would it be so different for a country to ban pork based on social and religious ideals that deem the pig as dirty animal? Could we live in a world without bacon? Why are we not identifying the dangerous production of processed and unnatural foods and protest on those instead? Who decided to make foie the posterboy for animal cruelty and world food issues?

Oh yeah, all that good stuff and let me eat my meat or foie. I don't enjoy food philosophical terrorism. I am also looking forward to Head To Tail dinner at Incanto. Woohoo, gonna rub animal parts all over my mouth and send them to PETA for shits and giggles. How do you like them propaganda apples?